I’ve yet to meet someone who isn’t haunted by the specter of perfectionism. Maybe some struggle with it more than others, but everyone has felt that haunting stinging thought of “What if I’m not good enough? What if I fail?”
We have such high standards for ourselves and yet when we look at scripture, we find a whole bunch of figures who were, to put it mildly, total human dumpster fires.
Peter denied Jesus. Paul persecuted believers. David murdered a man and stole his wife. Moses gave into the pressure of the people he was leading and had huge struggles with doubt. And need I remind anyone of Eve’s mess with the fruit? The Bible is ripe with people who knew God closely and were still wildly, disastrously imperfect.
The problem here, if you’re anything like me, is that you can read that whole list and somehow still think to yourself “Well that was them but I can be better.”
No. No you can’t.
Let’s just get that out of the way now. Maybe you won’t mess up in the exact same way as those Bible figures, but you will mess up, totally and thoroughly. You will mess up. You probably have moments you already messed up prickling at your mind right now.
Perfectionism is a huge struggle, not just for everybody else.
You have to find a way to know you’re going to be imperfect, but try your best anyway and let God take care of the rest. You have to trust that his Grace reaches farther than your shortcomings.
And a bit of good news? The best work is never done by your hand anyway. All of my greatest moments of showing up for people have been neither of my creation or really even my doing. Most of the time, I’ve felt like nothing more than a pipe, delivering a steady stream of something I could never have made on my own. Or sometimes it’s like being asked to hop into the passenger seat for a moment and I just watch as Jesus, in the words of the great Carrie Underwood, takes the wheel.
God’s perfection is enough to cover your imperfection. He is sufficient.
It’s no mistake that so much of Biblical encouragement to early believers focuses on God’s capability instead of ours. Nowhere in the Bible is it written “Don’t worry! Now that you are believers you’re never going to make a mistake again! So get out there and be perfect!”. Nope. What we do see time and time again is the reminder that while we’re nothing compared to God, he is actively covering us and carrying us through. He is far more capable than we could ever hope to be.
If we surrender ourselves to him with everything we have, we wrap ourselves up in his capability. I’ve had some spectacular foul ups, but never so big that God can’t still work in my life. Those moments of failure can’t undo the good work God is doing. Do they hurt? Yup. Do I wish they didn’t happening? Definitely. Would I do things differently if I got the chance to do them again? 100%.
But they’re covered, and that has to be enough. They are covered, and I’m still wanted. God wants relationship with me on the day of my biggest foul up just as much as on the day I think I’m knocking it out of the park.
God wants you because you’re you, not because you’re perfect. Yes, we want to give things our all and yes it hurts when we mess up, but God is not distancing himself from you when you fall short. Like all those figures from the Bible who royally screwed up and were still called beloved, God looks on you in delight.
Your imperfect self is loved perfectly. It doesn’t get much better than that.
Let’s find some joy,
A
Avalon Robinson Author 